is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Randomize