Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
The struggles of a small town man whore
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
