I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
