You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
