I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Randomize
