Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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