singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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