if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Randomize
