Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I enjoy the company of your penis
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