We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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