I saw his package. It spoke to me.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
