Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
