Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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