I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
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