whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
i can't believe i had my finger in that
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
