thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Randomize
