I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
