Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Randomize
