Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
What drink are we having for lunch?
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Randomize
