So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Randomize
