yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
