That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
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