just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
