Define "chronic" masturbator.
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
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