Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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