I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
