Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
