I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
I would fuck him just for his dog
Randomize