Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
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