I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
