The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
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