Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
You're like the curious george of whores
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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