I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
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