He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
