Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
either way he was missing a nipple.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
