we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
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