would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Randomize