YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
No subtext here. People are naked.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Randomize
