Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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