I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize
