So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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