my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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