also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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