I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Randomize
