Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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