Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
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