i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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