I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize
