the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
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