ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize