i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
