I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
it's great music for shaving your balls
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
